Sunday 31 August 2014

By Mattie MacDonald





Marriage is very tricky at times. It is hard to work on your relationship at times without some outside help. There is nothing wrong with getting outside help with someone you are saying or married to. Couples counseling can become a requisite at times when you feel stuck in your relationship. Find out which counselors are in your area and make an appointment.



Find a counselor in your local area that you and your spouse can bond with. Bonding is really crucial or you will not be able to open up to him or her about your thoughts or feelings regarding the marriage. Communication is the key to a healthy marriage. Try to tell your spouse how you feel about them and how they are treating you.



Some people look down on those who get professional help from a psychologist. Those people should be ignored because getting help is the right thing to do. Holding things in and taking that out onto others is what is not helpful. Being kind to your loved ones will help the relationship dynamic a lot. Try to pick friends that appreciate the fact that you are getting counseling and do not undermine it.



Judging others is what some people do even though they should not do that. It is a reality that people engage in judging even though the people they are judging are doing a good thing. This seems unfortunate and very wrong. Many bad things happen in the world because people do not get help so when they do get help, it should be encouraged and not discouraged.



If you ever feel hurt, reach out and tell your counselor. This is what they are there for. Holding things in is not healthy. Journal your thoughts or share them verbally. Your body can actually feel the tension of holding things in. Do not hold them in if you do not have to. It could be really toxic to your mental and physical health to hold things in for extended periods.



Tell your therapist what you need to in order to feel like you are being heard. It is really important to feel heard. It is validating and empowering to feel like you are being heard. Reach out and be assertive so your needs get met. This may take some getting used to if you are not used to being assertive. If you know how to do this, you can use those skills in your relationship as well.



You may not feel heard by your spouse. Voice as much as you can in your therapy sessions so you can share with your therapist what is going on. Practicing the therapist's suggestions during the sessions really helps. It is a good way to make some mistakes and then correct them with the help of the counselor.



Trials are a part of life. They are there to see if we are strong and will ensure them. Overcoming them is desirable instead of succumbing to them. Giving up is not what should be done. People were created to be strong even in the face of adversity. This courage will mean a lot to you when you really need it. It will pay off.









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