Monday 15 December 2014

By Lucia Weeks





Teens would learn stuff on sex whether parents talk to them about it or not. How to talk to teens about sex can be an issue for parents who are not comfortable with the subject. Teenagers learn sex issues at school and from their peers, and so if parents fail to give them the right information, they would take whatever they get from outside the home. It is the responsibility of parents to shape the beliefs of their young ones, even on sex matters.



First, it is important to note that talking to teens on sex is an ongoing process, therefore conversations should be part of normal life. Short and frequent conversations are recommended rather than a big one-off talk. In addition, you do not have to be experts on sexuality to have meaningful conversation with teenagers.



You need to prepare before talking to teens about sex. Read the subject, and get more information, and get answers to your own questions before talking to your teen. There are age-appropriate books on sex for parents. You can also practice what you want to discuss with your spouse or partner. This will make it easier to get over any embarrassment when the time comes to talk with your teen.



The talk on sex has to be structured in a progressive manner. Most parents wait for the 'right' moment to talk to their children about sex, but do not know when this right time comes. A parent can begin a conversation on sex with a teen whenever the issue comes up, for instance when sex issues come up while watching television or while on the way back from shopping. The conversation has to be inculcated into daily life activities.



It is important to be honest when talking to teenagers on sex. Admit to your teen that discussing sex issues isn't easy for you, but it is important that information concerning sex comes from you. This can help your teen open up when it comes to their feelings. Offer to find answers, or look them up together if you do not know how to answer your teen's questions.



The information given to teens on sex has to be very accurate. When in doubt, it is important to explain to the teenagers. If the wrong information is given, they would get other contradictory information that would leave them even more confused. The parent should also explain the issues based on their own beliefs. Attempts should not be made to scare these young ones from sex as this would not work for long.



The talk on sex should be in the form of a discussion where teens can have the opportunities of asking questions and also express their views. This way, they will learn better. Trying to lecture them may not be the best option, because the parent cannot be sure the teen is listening.



If talking about sex with your teen seems impossible because you are too embarrassed or your teen refuses to listen, try different approaches. You can get age-appropriate sex education books for teens and leave them in your child's bed room. You can also ask a trusted aunt or uncle, or a minister for help. Remember, talking to teenagers about sex can be difficult, but it is important and nothing can replace your influence.









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