Saturday 27 September 2014

By Karina Frost





Coaching is a different process to teaching or instructing. It is best described as facilitation. Clients are assisted to identify problems and work at creating solutions. Various relationship coaching tools and strategies are used in this process. Old baggage can be released, impasses broken, new ways learned of facing problems and much more.



Relationships are central to all of our lives and can be the most fulfilling and well as the most challenging area. Unfortunately many of us end up in relationships without having any idea of what they will require from us. We do not know the best ways to deal with issues when they arise, how to set boundaries or even how to communicate most effectively. This is why so many relationships end up in divorce courts. However, coaching provides a means of assisting couples with all of these aspects.



Coaches use many different ways to help people who are stuck to move on and to look at things in a different light. Those who have years of experience have learned which strategies really work. At the root of most problems lie emotions and emotionally charged issues can be resolved with the strategies acquired. Each partner is assisted to work through their own emotions and to support one another in this respect.



Relationships can suffer from many different types of problems. Couples may not know how to resolve issues without fighting. They may be drifting along in the same old ruts, having lost a sense of romance. They might be suffering from a lack of boundaries or lack of true acceptance of one another despite flaws. Communication and listening skills are often lacking. These are all issues that can be addressed and changed.



A coach is objective enough to be able to identify problems, provide insight and offer solutions. It may be necessary to actually draw up new agreements whereby the roles, responsibilities and rights of each partner are clearly identified. Couples can also be coached in how to resolve emotionally charged issues in the best possible way without one partner shutting down or getting angry.



Many couples have developed certain negative behavior patterns over the years. A coach can help them to identify these and help to break out of them. They will begin to realize how and why they are stuck and given tips on how to move forward. A shared vision can be created whereby they begin to see the big picture again instead of being mired down by negative issues.



Communication and listening skills are vitally important in relationships. Everyone wants their partner to communicate with them and really listen to what they are saying. Very often, the other partner is only listening with half an ear or planning what he or she is going to say next. Fortunately, couples can be taught many tips and techniques to communicate and listen in a way that creates more trust and security.



Most couples can benefit from coaching. They are given insight on what may be preventing them from moving forward. The coach helps them to overcome stumbling blocks by using various strategies and tools. These can be used effectively for the rest of their lives, helping them to build healthy, fulfilling relationships.









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